the Imperfect Storm

I've gotta escape
     the war inside my head
I can never win
     each victory seems pyrrhic
And I have
     everything to lose

So step back, friend
     Fuck off, mind
I must find truce
     embittered armistice
Before the battle begins
     or ends

Now I have
     abandoned ship
In the imperfect storm
     I am tossed
I row in hope
     (in vain?--in desperation)

Towards an island
     I have seen
Many pictures of
     but can only find
In my most
     secret dreams

On rocks and sand I lay
     retching, wretched
Half-decayed and half-insane
     Battered by the winds,
The waves; perfected by
     my imperfect storm

A half-man grown now
     ready and fierce
To seize my life, seize this
     new land, these tides
In my embrace
     for my command