Adventure

Remember when every day was an adventure?
When it was a gift and a privilege to wake up?
Remember the sun and the rain upon your skin,
So vibrant, tantalizing... so real?
Remember the nights of laughter,
Remember the nights of pain?
The joy, the sorrow--the feeling, where is it now?
Has it deserted me?--that fleeting, fickle bitch.
Have I changed? Is this a cruel, unforeseen regression,
Or is it destiny's natural progression?
Is life laughing at me, teasing and spiteful and cruel?
Hell--is this even life at all? Not how I remember it.

Am I swirling in the dregs of a sordid dream,
Lying adrift in the bottom of a mug
Like a crushed soul at the bottom of a well?
But if this is a dream, it is no nightmare,
No wet dream, nor a vision.
This is a purgatory: an endless, sightless oblivion.
Oh! how I long for hell, the wicked caress of eternal flame--
Sharp, brutal, agonizing: I pray for it desperately.